Heavy Heart

Ever read something and you feel your heart drop, tears swell in your eyes, agony in your soul and pain in the pit of your stomach? I have a few times. And I did again today.

 First of all I have encouraged my FB friends to follow a blog link and lift a cyber sister in Christ up in prayer. She had a stoke, is 38, a wife and mom. She is battling for her life. http://thesimplewife.typepad.com/the_simple_wife/ <----Please click here and read her story. Share it. And PLEASE pray for her and her young children, her husband and her family.

But what I read today was painful. Every time I read my friends FB posts and her blog regarding her newest updates I get that feeling. I haven't written too much on my blog about her except to pray for her.
 Her website is -------> http://www.charyssehesse.com/ and it is also located on the left of my blog under Faithfully Praying.

I met Charysse during one of the best times of my life. Ron and I were hanging out and beginning to date, get engaged, married. We became fast friends and we watched her and one of Ron's best friend Mike graduate from college. We hung out quite a bit going out and having tons of fun and were there for her wedding. We spent Superbowl's together for several years. Charysse and I went out for dinners and I LOVED my time with her. She was one of very few people I could talk to about faith, and the joy of knowing God. We have shared so many things and have a lot of similarities. She came to the hospital to meet my girls each time a new one came into this world. When Brooke was born almost 7 years ago is when I found out her life was being turned upside down.
 Long story short. She has a brain tumor. She has been fighting a recurrence for several years now. It's been stable. God is so good. However, in the past few months things have changed for her. And just today she was gracious enough to post on her page about the new findings. Through all her research into her own battle she has taken time out in the past 9 months to send Ron and I links that she feels could be vital to help us in our own battle of a fight God placed in our lives, autism. Charysse is a beautiful friend.
Her news today that she shared was hard to read. It felt like it did when I read her first initial email years ago saying she had a tumor. I cry when I think of her. My chest aches for her. My stomach twists and turns in heartache for her battle. She is so strong. She is so faithful. She fights and keeps fighting.
I am battling a battle of anger and sometime even resentment. I often wonder how things would be with out that stupid tumor in her life. Yeah, I know I am being so super selfish. I know. And I even feel really shollow writing that. But it's true. She is a wonderful friend and I really miss the friendship we had before all of this. I am blessed that she makes time for me and we get to message and email. But I want HER. SO yeah, tumors suck. I hate them. It's SO unfair. I can't hardly begin to lift her in prayer and the tears fall. I miss her hugs and being able to see her easily.
 I know that God has changed my life through her strength in her battle. I know that peoples lives are being changed that she has never met. People that just stumble across her website. I often wonder how many people have seen her life and her faith and said, "I want that too. God come into my heart. Forgive me of my sins." I can't begin to think of how much of an impact her life has on others. I know it's huge.
 If you have not read her blog, or if you have never heard about her, you should. PLEASE pray for her. Pray for Gods healing on her body, her brain and this tumor. Pray that her tumor will be low grade still and not stage 4. She has surgery February 17th.
She has an amazing and wonderful husband and two of the cutest little boys. Our youngests are just a week apart. I am pleading with you to add her to your prayer list. Pass her website along, get others to join in. "Praying for Charysse" is on FB. Find it and join in the power of prayer for her. She needs every brother and sister praying. Thank you to whoever is out here in my blog world reading this that will commit to praying for her.
Charysse if you happen to read this, know that I love you SO much. Our friendship is so special to me. I used to think you had no idea how much you mean to me. But I really think you do. ;) Keep fighting.

Forgive me for any typos. This is one of those ones that it is better just to post.